Big Brother BETTING: Winners Market

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And so Dale slumped in the bathroom, weeping softly, explaining that he's always been picked on because of "the way I look" - by which he presumably meant he was bullied because if his inability to fully house his immense tongue in such a tiny pouting mouth. The meanies will be pleased to know that they can resume their mockery in good time. Dale won't win, he lacks the necessary energy/charisma to make teenie voters fall in love with him, and now even Big Brother is picking on him by sending in a stronger, funnier and better looking version of him into the house in the form of Stuart - a muscular single dad intended to make Dale’s love interest, Jennifer, swoon. On the plus side for Dale, Stuart might be cooler than him, but he's far too staggeringly cocksure to go the distance - a bit like Josh from Big Brother 2, another late arrival.

Others who can forget about whooping crowds and celebratory fireworks are Sylvia, Dennis, Mario and Lisa. Sylvia will have alienated the flocks of coupled up girlfriends/boyfriends with her sexually aggressive behaviour towards new boy Stu - she is every contented girlfriend's worst nightmare, and as Stuart rightfully suggests, a "minx". Once up, she could easily be eliminated. Dennis has made the same mistake as Billi from last year by attempting to go in with a game plan, completely unaware that no one bothers with those any more. His constant second guessing has made him look bitchy and paranoid, he will either find eviction or a nervous breakdown in the next few weeks.

Lisa and Mario have come to resemble the kind of people who meet other couples in car parks and down shady looking lanes, and their bath-times are becoming increasingly disturbing. The gap between them and the rest of the group is growing, hence they won't do anything to dispel the fact that older people can't win Big Brother.

Making up the middle of the pack are Rex, Mo, Rachel, Darnell, Jennifer and Michael. Rex, Mo and Darnell could all yet rise or fall down the ranks, having so far played their cards close to their chests. Of the three, Mohamed seems the most sympathetic character, recently demonstrating a strong sense of justice when he took on Sylvia for her biscuit and beer thievery, and his civil war back story is absolutely thrilling. The big question is whether an interesting life can make for an interesting human being - the same applies to jailbird Darnell. Of the girls, Jennifer has buckets of opinion and a kindly Geordie accent, but as a straight-faced single mum, seemingly underwhelmed by the joys of motherhood, she lacks the necessary euphoria to go all the way. Rachel is, so far, too boring to win, and Michael was supposed to play a cheerfully afflicted blind man, but has proved too menacing and bitter. Big Brother rules state that those with disabilities must be cheerful at all times (Pete, winner, series seven).

Which leaves Kathreya, Luke and Bex. Both girls should fare well, as they have the right mix of likability and funny stuff to keep voters happy, but with only one genetic girl winner ever (Kate Lawler, series three), all out victory should be a bridge too far. Hence Luke looks the most interesting bet for the time being, and his diary room sound bites are reminiscent of Jon Tickle (series four) and Glynn (series seven), two of the show's most popular characters.